Donald Trump and the 'crying' thing

On tears.

(Donald Trump, not crying)

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On Saturday night at a rally in Waco, Texas, Donald Trump recounted how then Rep. Ron DeSantis had begged for an endorsement in the 2018 Florida governor’s race.

“He came and said ‘I really want it,’” Trump recounted. “I said, ‘You can't win, can you?’ ‘Sir, if you endorse me I'll win. Please, sir, endorse me. And I said, ‘Alright, let's give it a shot.’”

Tim Miller @Timodc

Now Trump claiming Ron was crying when he asked for his endorsement. "sir if you endorse me I'll win, please sir"

It’s not the first time that Trump has suggested DeSantis was in literal tears when asking for his endorsement.

“Ron DeSantis got elected because of me,” the former president told conservative radio host Hugh Hewitt last month. “You remember, he had nothing, he was dead, he was leaving the race, he came over and he begged me, begged me, for an endorsement. He was getting ready to drop out…. He said, ‘If you endorse me, I’ll win,’ and there were tears coming down from his eyes.”

Republican Accountability @AccountableGOP

Donald Trump claims that Ron DeSantis called him before the 2018 primary in tears begging for an endorsement: "He said, 'if you endorse me, I'll win,' and there were tears coming down from his eyes."

DeSantis is far from the only person to cry in Trump’s presence, according to Trump. It actually happens a lot.

Trump tears chief correspondent Daniel Dale wrote a detailed piece about all of this back in 2018 — headlined “According to Donald Trump, a lot of people are crying around Donald Trump.”

There was the time in the spring of 2017 when the executive of a “major, major company” came to the White House. As Trump recounted:

“I said, ‘Have you been to the White House before?’ ‘Yes, 51 times.’ I said, ‘Oh good, so you’ve been to the Oval Office.’ ‘No, I was never brought to the Oval Office.’ I said, ‘Come on, I’ll bring you to the Oval Office.’ The person came into the Oval Office and started to cry. This is a tough person, by the way. Came into the Oval Office and started to cry.”

Or the time in January 2018 when farmers came up to Trump — sobbing in thanks. “Men that were tough and strong, women that were tough and strong — they’d see me, they had tears coming down their eyes, because I gave them back their property, I gave them back their farms,” he said.

And the time nine mineworkers greeted him at a 2018 rally in Indiana. Eight of the nine were crying, according to Trump. “Crying out of happiness. Because they’re back.”

How many of these stories are literally true? Almost impossible to know — although I would suspect there is a decent chunk of exaggeration in Trump’s retelling of these various crying jags. Like, a lot.

What’s more interesting to me than the veracity of the crying is the “why” behind it for Trump. And there are two distinct threads there:

1. Crying out of happiness. This is the more common type of crying around Trump. This happens when people are so overwhelmed in his presence — or by some sort of beneficent act he has performed — that they are moved to tears. It’s important for Trump to establish that these people are not the crying type; they are simply overtaken by emotion while in his presence. It’s indicative, for Trump, of all the good he is doing in the world — despite the attacks from the mainstream media, Democrats and, well, everyone else too. The “regular Joe”GETS Trump, and Trump gets the regular Joe.

2. Crying out of pathetic-ness. This is where Trump’s story about DeSantis fits in. DeSantis was crying because he was SO desperate for Trump’s approval that he couldn’t contain his emotions. Because Trump had the ability to make or break his candidacy and DeSantis knew it. Everything depended on Trump giving him the thumbs up or thumbs down.

This form of crying is almost exclusively reserved for politicians who need Trump so, so bad. Like DeSantis. It’s meant to show weakness or subservience to Trump. Trump is the alpha, the crier is the beta.

Trump’s own views on crying are well established. It’s not for him.

Witness this exchange between Trump and Christian Broadcasting Network’s David Brody during the 2016 campaign:

BRODY: This is my Barbara Walters question, and it’s not ‘What tree would you be?’ But I’m curious, have you cried before? Has that been something that you’ve done in your life?

TRUMP: Well, that’s even beyond a Barbara Walters question; she has never asked me that. No, I’m not a big crier. I like to get things done. I’m not a big crier. I’m not someone who goes around crying a lot. But I know people like that. I know plenty of people that cry. They’re very good people. But I have not been a big crier.

Ok, a few thoughts.

1. Trump is not a “big crier.”

2. He views crying as getting in the way of “get[ting] things done.”

3. He knows people who “go around crying a lot.”

4. These are good people, despite their crying

5. He is, again, not a “big crier.”

Which, again, telling.

(SIDEBAR: I am a crier. I wrote about in 2016.)

As is this anecdote: When Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer teared up discussing Trump’s travel ban in 2017, Trump wasn’t buying it.

“I noticed Charles E. Schumer yesterday with fake tears,” Trump said. “I’m gonna ask him who is his acting coach because I know him very well, I don’t see him as a crier. If he is, he’s a different man. There’s about a five percent chance that it was real, but I think they were fake tears.”

Which, weirdly, is a compliment of sorts from Trump. In Trump’s estimation, Schumer is too tough to really cry — so he must have been faking it for political reasons.

How best then to understand crying in Trump’s view? It’s ok, occasionally, for the average person to cry — especially when overwhelmed by gratitude for some amazing thing Trump did.

But for a politician — or, really, any public figure — it is unacceptable, a sign of weakness and desperation. It is beneath the likes of Trump and a testament to some sort of weakness of character.

It’s worth noting that Trump’s view on crying is not definitive among politicians. His immediate predecessor in office — Barack Obama — cried several times in public, most notably when discussing the 2012 Sandy Hook School shooting.