Why I really loved Barack Obama's convention speech

On what politics can be.

Ask anyone today what they remember from former President Obama’s speech at this year’s Democratic National Convention and they are likely to mention the, uh, size thing:

Which, I get. Obama has always been good at sticking the political knife in with a smile. And that size joke was perfectly in keeping with that reputation.

But, for me, the really powerful — and important — part of Obama’s speech came much later in his address. After he had taken his obligatory digs at Donald Trump. And after he had pumped up Vice President Kamala Harris and her resume.

It was when Obama — in the most partisan setting possible — delivered a rebuke of not just Republicans but also Democrats for their default willingness to always see the worst in the other side.

Here’s what spoke to me (it’s long but very much worth your time):

Democracy isn't just a bunch of abstract principles and dusty laws in some book somewhere. It's the values we live by. It's the way we treat each other, including those who don't look like us or pray like us or see the world exactly like we do.

That sense of mutual respect has to be part of our message. Our politics have become so polarized these days that all of us across the political spectrum seem so quick to assume the worst in others, unless they agree with us on every single issue.

We start thinking that the only way to win is to scold and shame and out-yell the other side. And after a while, regular folks just tune out, or they don't bother to vote.

Now, that approach may work for the politicians who just want attention and thrive on division. But it won't work for us.

To make progress on the things we care about, the things that really affect people's lives, we need to remember that we've all got our blind spots and contradictions and prejudices, and that if we want to win over those who aren't yet ready to support our candidates, we need to listen to their concerns and maybe learn something in the process.

After all, if a parent or grandparent occasionally says something that makes us cringe, we don't automatically assume they're bad people. We recognize that the world is moving fast, that they need time and maybe a little encouragement to catch up. Our fellow citizens deserve the same grace we hope they'll extend to us.

Like, yes. Even YES.

That’s it. Exactly.

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Look. Obama isn’t perfect. I get the incongruity of making a dick joke and then 15 minutes later calling on people to get beyond name-calling in politics.

I give Obama some grace on that front because Donald Trump led a years-long campaign to paint him as an “other” —via questioning whether Obama had, in fact, been born in the United States.

That kind of thing can wear on you. And make even the most magnanimous person go small sometimes.

To me though, those paragraphs above are the essence of Obama. I think he genuinely means it. And has been saying something very similar for a very long time.

The best speech he ever gave — in 2008 following the controversy over his association with Rev. Jeremiah Wright — hit on many of these same themes. Watch it if you haven’t. Trust me.

What Obama is appealing to in those lines — and in is speech Tuesday night — is our common humanity. He’s trying to remind us — ALL of us — that we have WAY more in common than not.

Politics — especially in this moment — is aimed at taking those places where we disagree and dividing us. It aims to make us forget that reasonable people can disagree. That political differences don’t have to decisive.

Here’s Obama, again from Tuesday night, on just that (bolding is mine):

Now, I know these ideas can feel pretty naive right now. We live in a time of such confusion and rancor, with a culture that puts a premium on things that don't last. Money, fame, status, likes.

We chase the approval of strangers on our phones. We build all manner of walls and fences around ourselves, and then we wonder why we feel so alone. We don't trust each other as much because we don't take the time to know each other.

And in that space between us, politicians and algorithms teach us to caricature each other, and troll each other, and fear each other. But here's the good news, Chicago. All across America, in big cities and small towns, away from all the noise, the ties that bind us together are still there.

We still coach Little League and look out for our elderly neighbors. We still feed the hungry in churches, and mosques, and synagogues, and temples.

We share the same pride when our Olympic athletes compete for the gold.

Because the vast majority of us do not want to live in a country that's bitter and divided.

That just really resonates with me.

I am someone who has spent 25 years writing and talking about politics. I have done it in print, on TV, and, for the last 16 years, on social media. (I first joined Twitter at the Democratic National Convention in 2008.)

And what I have seen over that time is a political conversation that increasingly rewards bad actors. The meaner you can be the better. Attacking peoples’ motives — and intelligence — is the coin of the realm. It’s how you get attention. And attention equals relevance. And money.

So much of the political conversation now is driven by what I would describe not as journalism but as fan service.

Posting — on social media or yes here on Substack — that Donald Trump shit himself or farts in the courtroom is the best way to drive paid subscribers to your product. Or that Kamala Harris hates America and has a secret plan to destroy it.

Partisans have become accustomed to being told they’re right about, well, everything. And that the other side isn’t just wrong or stupid or misinformed but actually evil.

I wonder, all the time, whether the people who flock to these fan service sites know they are being fed red meat solely as a means to separate them from their money. Like, there’s a business plan there, people! This is all a strategy to make some people rich!

The problem is that while these people DO get rich, we, as a democracy, wind up the worse for it.

Because there’s just NO way that obsessing over Trump’s bowel movements or weight (or Harris’ laugh or blended family) is a good thing for democracy.

To be clear: I am not suggesting that Trump and Harris (or their parties) are equally responsible for this. Trump has elevated bullying, partisanship and demonization of the “other” to previously unseen heights.

But, if we are ever going to find a way through to the other side of this mess, I think the solution lies in what Obama talked about Tuesday night: Working at seeing the best in people. Avoiding questioning motives or intelligence. Offering grace — in hopes it will be offered back to us.

I struggle with that myself.

Last night, in our live chat for paid subscribers during the DNC, I mentioned that Chuck Schumer’s claim that Democrats were going to pick up Senate seats in this election was almost certainly wrong.

Someone in the chat responded — and I am paraphrasing here — “If your predictions are so good why did CNN get rid of you?”

I was taken aback. And, if I am being honest, pissed off. I jotted out a few snarky responses. Then I deleted them. And instead I simply said, again paraphrasing, that I had been very open about my struggles following my layoff, didn’t think it was about the quality of my work and have worked hard to build a new platform where I can express my views.

The person apologized. We moved on.

My first instinct though was to just pop off. To answer nastiness with nastiness.

That’s the danger we all face. Taking the low road feels good! Demonizing another person makes us feel better — at least in the short term.

But the reality we all now face is this: Our politics is broken. It no longer serves us. And that’s OUR fault. Because we are too quick to judge others. Too quick to look for — and pay for — opinions that agree with us rather than seek out thoughtful dissenting opinions. Too willing to question motives — or to assume there is some nefarious plan being enacted behind our backs. (My favorite: The idea I am a secret Trump plant!)

As I said above, Obama isn’t the perfect messenger to carry this reminder of our common humanity. Neither am I. Neither is, if we are being honest, any of us.

But, together, we might be able to do something. Slowly but surely.

So all that I ask of you is to take a pause before you write that snarky or nasty comment. Before you call a name. Before you assume you (and your party) have ALL the right ideas maybe consider the possibility that, well, you don’t. And that disagreeing without being disagreeable isn’t just a cliche but a good policy to adopt in life.

We aren’t going to solve this problem today. Or tomorrow. But if we want to have a different kind of politics, it needs to start with us acting differently toward politics.

Thanks for listening.