I got a job!

On learning a new lesson.

Last week, I wrote about the best part of being laid off.

And, in that piece, I mentioned that I was not working at the moment — since being laid off by CNN late last year.

Which isn’t quite right, a point that several astute readers made to me after reading my piece.

I haven’t been not working. I’ve been writing and building this community for the last 9 months. Which now has over 1,200 paying subscribers!

That really rocked my world. Because for the longest time since I got laid off, I have thought of myself as unemployed. But, I realized — thanks to you all — that work comes in lots of different forms and shapes. And that just because you aren’t going into an office doesn’t mean you aren’t working.

I think my idea of work has been out-of-date for a while now. I was raised in a very traditional household. My dad had ONE job — public school teacher — his entire life.

I still remember when I told him I was thinking of leaving the Washington Post, he was incredulous. Why would I leave a good and stable company that liked me and appreciated me? He couldn’t get his head around it — no matter how many times I explained that CNN was a unique (and new!) opportunity for me that I was really excited about. (In retrospect, he might have been right. Ha!)

He was of a generation (as was my late father-in-law) that worked for one company for the entirety of their professional career. That was how it is done. You got up every morning, went to work, put in an 8-10 hour day and then came home. Rinse and repeat.

For my first 20+ years in the workforce, that’s exactly what I did too. And I never really thought about it. I assumed I would be employed — steadily — my whole life. I found success in work, and meaning.

It wasn’t until CNN laid me off that I had to think — hard and seriously — about what work meant to me, and what I really wanted out of it.

I’d like to say that starting this Substack was part of some grand plan to refashion how, when and why I worked. It wasn’t. It was, at the start, a coping mechanism. I always have found solace in writing. And the idea of building a community around my observations was deeply gratifying at a time when I was struggling to figure out who I was without “CNN” in front of my name.

I think until very recently I’ve thought of this newsletter in that way — a fun distraction but not, really, work.

But, the truth I have had my eyes opened to is that I have been working all of this time. No, I don’t go into an office. I don’t wear a suit (most days!). I am not on TV.

That said, I am getting up every morning thinking of what I want to write that day. Brainstorming good angles. Trying to develop ways to service this community — the free and, especially, the paid side.

This is work! It takes mental energy! It wears me out (at times). It’s not all that dissimilar from what I was doing during my time at CNN and WaPo!

(Sidebar: None of the above means I am done looking for other work too. I definitely am — inside and outside of journalism.)

This may seem painfully obvious to you, dear reader. You may think me dumb for just coming to this realization now — months after I decided I wanted to write a newsletter on this platform.

But, for me, this has been deeply revelatory and perception-altering. It has transformed what I am doing day in and day out from a side project to something that I am trying to treat with the rigor and seriousness that I would treat any other job.

Which doesn’t mean it’s not fun! I love politics. Always have, always will. And, my ability to write about things outside of just politics in this space — which I had never done before — has elicited such positive reactions and has been truly affirming for me as I muddle through a challenging phase of my life.

What it does mean is that my definition of “work” is changing. In a good way! So, thank you for that: It is truly a gift.