This post can make a difference for people who sometimes feel like you, but have a hard time admitting it. While I know that your intent was to share your experiences and thoughts (and not necessarily look for a pep talk), you should know that I have always been a fan of your work and analysis, am rooting for you, and am confident that you will continue to succeed.
I am glad you are having a better day today! And thank you for being so open and honest. It is so important to get the word out that most people do have good and bad days.
As much as I enjoy your political posts, this was the one that convinced me to subscribe to your Substack. As a retiree who has had to deal with chronic depression my whole lifetime, I've seen some improvement in attitudes, and certainly a lot more effective treatment options these days, but there is, as your article points out, a long way still to go.
Thanks, Richard. I am trying the best way I know how to be open and honest about this process -- losing a job, losing my father in law -- over the past 9 months. It's been VERY challenging, and that's ok. I think it would be weird if I wasn't struggling through a period like this.
I recently read something about social media posts and how they affect us. It gave me a clearer perspective on it. The writer said that social media posts reflect a person’s outside, and we compare that to our inside.
We usually post our best moments- vacations, family time, fun outings. But most of our life isn’t that way. It just feels like that on social media. When I remember that, I feel better.
Thanks for being open and honest. It's tough for me to sometimes feel bad while also knowing how privileged I am. We need to make it okay to not be okay. Hope today and tomorrow are better for you.
Such an important discussion. Many people in my circle of family & friends (& me) struggle with some level of anxiety or depression at various times. It can be reassuring to hear that many people have days of sadness or anxiety, and sharing helps clarify some aspects of what’s “normal” vs. debilitating symptoms. Like physical ailments, “how serious is this?” & “should I see the doctor?” are real questions.
This is such a good point. I think it's really important we establish what "normal" is so that people can have a better sense of whether what their feeling is something they can deal with or something they need help with. And that starts by just talking about how we all feel.
I’m thinking that not expecting some days to be bad makes those days harder to cope with. I’m looking at a total knee replacement soon. When discussing post op appointments the surgeons PA said the timing was to get me past the point when I wanted to kill my surgeon. That told me to important things.
1. Recovery would be hard (bad days coming)
2. The hard days wouldn’t last forever
Forewarned is forearmed. I’m now less anxious about my recovery.
I am 5 weeks post op total knee replacement. I will be having my other knee done in October. I have also had a hip replacement, same surgeon that is doing my knees. He told me that a knee replacement is much harder than the hip. Yup, he is correct. However, it isn’t nearly as bad as I was expecting. The first 3 weeks were the hardest but at 5 days post op I was at a neighbors bbq and at 2 weeks post op going out for dinner. The hardest, for me, is sleeping. If you have a recliner, that will be your friend 24/7. I have only started to sleeping in bed and did sleep in the recliner last night. My OS has a different protocol than most and did NOT want me icing or elevating. If you are able to ice & elevate, I would recommend getting an ice machine and also a wedge pillow. Before my 2 week mark, I was walking and forgetting the walker and have been walking without the cane in the house since 2.5 weeks. When going out, I use the cane. My doctor believes in just using the knee. Getting up from a chair is quite difficult in the beginning. Don’t get alarmed with the swelling and bruising. Here I am going on and on. Good luck with your knee. When is your surgery?
Glad to hear today is better. Yes, we all have a bad day or 2 from time to time. However, many people feel that people don’t care to hear it and just say “I am fine”. Mental health issues still carry a stigma, we’ve come a long way from the 70s (my dad needed to be an inpatient for 30 days) to now. However, the stigma still exists. I feel as though many of our troubles may cause us to feel alone, yet when sharing, we can feel as though others are going through it too, we are not alone. I have shared here before, I struggle with anxiety, OCD, ADHD. For the most part, I am doing okay but have my bad days, too. My son managed to hit the jackpot as he has anxiety, OCD, ADHD, PTSD (from a CPS state job) and depression. It was very hard for him to be able to open up and talk about it and some of it may be the Mars vs Venus thing, where men have a harder time to open up and talk. Once he was able to talk to others (lots of help from his therapist) about his struggles, he felt relieved to be able to let it out and he has a nice support group with his friends. My son had suicidal ideations when he was away at college, we’ve been through a lot with him. He has had lots of ups and downs since his college days and he is now happily married. He hit bottom this past January when my 87 year old dad committed suicide. That’s a story for another day. However, my son has made a remarkable turnaround and doing well. My point is, we have had many a conversations about this and how mental health is treated differently than a physical illness. As a parent, it is gut wrenching to see your child suffer and of course, when he has a bad day, I do as well as I worry like crazy. However, I am realizing that a bad day can be just a bad day. I am sharing all of this as I think that mental health is so very important and many more people struggle than we would think. Some may have mild symptoms, some may be worse but acknowledging that we have a bad day, is step one. Self care is an important piece as well.
Chris - if you think about how hard it was for you to say something, think of how much harder it is for younger, less mature and less experienced people (e.g., children) to see all of those images in social media and be aware those are not real life.
Congrats to you for writing and posting this message - acknowledging the issue is an important recognition.
You should know here on this substack is there are many, many people you can reach out to at any time for help - we follow you because we consider what you write meaningful and valuable. And it also means that you, as the creator, are meaningful and valuable to your readers. We believe what you are doing matters.
Looking forward to following you this evening during the first clown circus (err, republican) debate.
So important for people in the public eye such as yourself to talk about their struggles openly. You serve as a role model for others and more importantly your children. Kudos to you Chris!
Well, not just thank you. I think that there is an ironic reality in our current times. I think that on one level, in broad strokes, our society is becoming more aware of mental illness, opportunities for treatment, and talking a good game about making it more acceptable to talk about. Yet, my observation is that for real people, individually, it is still not especially safe to say those things you mentioned.
Years ago, my dad suddenly asked the family "does anyone else ever get a sudden, unexplained sense of doom?" I was young, didn't understand mental health and thought my dad was being melodramatic. Years later, I came to suspect that it was his way of trying to articulate that he was feeling depressed (seriously depressed, not merely "sad").
I didn't know how to help him then, or now. But, I think through open dialog such as your column...and many other public figures...we'll slowly chip away until perhaps a comment about a trip to the therapist is taken with the same attitude as a comment about a trip to the orthopedist.
I get that you are not equating your shitty day with someone suffering depression. But, even talking openly about your shitty day is a step toward our society being more healthy around the whole idea of mental health.
I hope. That's the goal. I just think we STILL have a social stigma about talking about mental health. Which scares me because it's clear that our collective mental health is declining.
I love how you write! It’s as if you’re having a conversation with me. I always looked forward to your comments on CNN and very thankful that I have the opportunity to continue the connection.
Too true. Like you I've never dealt with serious depression, but if I'm having the proverbial bad day each thing that goes wrong makes it exponentially worse. There are no easy answers but there is help. I had to be talked into seeing a therapist -- including by friends and family members who had gone that route themselves -- and that was a good thing. If you can't snap out of a bad day don't think you're all alone. Reach out to a support person (family member, friend, clergy, therapist, etc.) and don't be afraid to ask for help. It's a sign you're going to be all right.
Hi! I’m feeling so anxious today, and I feel silly being anxious, sitting in my comfortable house with my healthy kids. But here I am. The brain is a wild organ!
I can "relate" (as we said from back in the day) dealing with depression and ADD back in the day when the "treatment " was a crack in the head and "get up and do something."
Certainly RXs are there...never helped me much.
Suggest you stay away from the negativity --- difficult in your line of work.
Take joy from the simple aspects of life --- a good friend, a good song, a good, poem, a good book, a good walk.
And in the antiquated term -- "Just keep on keeping on!"
So glad that writing is therapeutic for you! Your willingness to write about personal struggles and successes helps those of us who have similar experiences with life. Please continue to write about your journey, as well as the political landscape! Your insights are greatly appreciated!
This post can make a difference for people who sometimes feel like you, but have a hard time admitting it. While I know that your intent was to share your experiences and thoughts (and not necessarily look for a pep talk), you should know that I have always been a fan of your work and analysis, am rooting for you, and am confident that you will continue to succeed.
Thanks fore the pep talk! I can always use one!
I am glad you are having a better day today! And thank you for being so open and honest. It is so important to get the word out that most people do have good and bad days.
Yes! We all have ups and downs. Pretending as though everything is perfect all the time does ourselves and everyone else a disservice.
As much as I enjoy your political posts, this was the one that convinced me to subscribe to your Substack. As a retiree who has had to deal with chronic depression my whole lifetime, I've seen some improvement in attitudes, and certainly a lot more effective treatment options these days, but there is, as your article points out, a long way still to go.
Thanks, Richard. I am trying the best way I know how to be open and honest about this process -- losing a job, losing my father in law -- over the past 9 months. It's been VERY challenging, and that's ok. I think it would be weird if I wasn't struggling through a period like this.
I recently read something about social media posts and how they affect us. It gave me a clearer perspective on it. The writer said that social media posts reflect a person’s outside, and we compare that to our inside.
We usually post our best moments- vacations, family time, fun outings. But most of our life isn’t that way. It just feels like that on social media. When I remember that, I feel better.
Kathleen, that is a really good way to think about it. Thank you.
Thanks for being open and honest. It's tough for me to sometimes feel bad while also knowing how privileged I am. We need to make it okay to not be okay. Hope today and tomorrow are better for you.
Thanks much -- and agree.
Such an important discussion. Many people in my circle of family & friends (& me) struggle with some level of anxiety or depression at various times. It can be reassuring to hear that many people have days of sadness or anxiety, and sharing helps clarify some aspects of what’s “normal” vs. debilitating symptoms. Like physical ailments, “how serious is this?” & “should I see the doctor?” are real questions.
This is such a good point. I think it's really important we establish what "normal" is so that people can have a better sense of whether what their feeling is something they can deal with or something they need help with. And that starts by just talking about how we all feel.
I’m thinking that not expecting some days to be bad makes those days harder to cope with. I’m looking at a total knee replacement soon. When discussing post op appointments the surgeons PA said the timing was to get me past the point when I wanted to kill my surgeon. That told me to important things.
1. Recovery would be hard (bad days coming)
2. The hard days wouldn’t last forever
Forewarned is forearmed. I’m now less anxious about my recovery.
I am 5 weeks post op total knee replacement. I will be having my other knee done in October. I have also had a hip replacement, same surgeon that is doing my knees. He told me that a knee replacement is much harder than the hip. Yup, he is correct. However, it isn’t nearly as bad as I was expecting. The first 3 weeks were the hardest but at 5 days post op I was at a neighbors bbq and at 2 weeks post op going out for dinner. The hardest, for me, is sleeping. If you have a recliner, that will be your friend 24/7. I have only started to sleeping in bed and did sleep in the recliner last night. My OS has a different protocol than most and did NOT want me icing or elevating. If you are able to ice & elevate, I would recommend getting an ice machine and also a wedge pillow. Before my 2 week mark, I was walking and forgetting the walker and have been walking without the cane in the house since 2.5 weeks. When going out, I use the cane. My doctor believes in just using the knee. Getting up from a chair is quite difficult in the beginning. Don’t get alarmed with the swelling and bruising. Here I am going on and on. Good luck with your knee. When is your surgery?
Thank you, Elaine. I’m a data junky so all data helps!
Glad to hear today is better. Yes, we all have a bad day or 2 from time to time. However, many people feel that people don’t care to hear it and just say “I am fine”. Mental health issues still carry a stigma, we’ve come a long way from the 70s (my dad needed to be an inpatient for 30 days) to now. However, the stigma still exists. I feel as though many of our troubles may cause us to feel alone, yet when sharing, we can feel as though others are going through it too, we are not alone. I have shared here before, I struggle with anxiety, OCD, ADHD. For the most part, I am doing okay but have my bad days, too. My son managed to hit the jackpot as he has anxiety, OCD, ADHD, PTSD (from a CPS state job) and depression. It was very hard for him to be able to open up and talk about it and some of it may be the Mars vs Venus thing, where men have a harder time to open up and talk. Once he was able to talk to others (lots of help from his therapist) about his struggles, he felt relieved to be able to let it out and he has a nice support group with his friends. My son had suicidal ideations when he was away at college, we’ve been through a lot with him. He has had lots of ups and downs since his college days and he is now happily married. He hit bottom this past January when my 87 year old dad committed suicide. That’s a story for another day. However, my son has made a remarkable turnaround and doing well. My point is, we have had many a conversations about this and how mental health is treated differently than a physical illness. As a parent, it is gut wrenching to see your child suffer and of course, when he has a bad day, I do as well as I worry like crazy. However, I am realizing that a bad day can be just a bad day. I am sharing all of this as I think that mental health is so very important and many more people struggle than we would think. Some may have mild symptoms, some may be worse but acknowledging that we have a bad day, is step one. Self care is an important piece as well.
Thanks for telling your story. And glad your son is doing well.
Chris - if you think about how hard it was for you to say something, think of how much harder it is for younger, less mature and less experienced people (e.g., children) to see all of those images in social media and be aware those are not real life.
Congrats to you for writing and posting this message - acknowledging the issue is an important recognition.
You should know here on this substack is there are many, many people you can reach out to at any time for help - we follow you because we consider what you write meaningful and valuable. And it also means that you, as the creator, are meaningful and valuable to your readers. We believe what you are doing matters.
Looking forward to following you this evening during the first clown circus (err, republican) debate.
Thanks, Mike. It is nice to know there is a community out there.
It is not just nice to know - it is something you can count on!
So important for people in the public eye such as yourself to talk about their struggles openly. You serve as a role model for others and more importantly your children. Kudos to you Chris!
Thanks, Ginny. I am trying to do my (small) part.
Thank you, Chris. Just thank you.
Well, not just thank you. I think that there is an ironic reality in our current times. I think that on one level, in broad strokes, our society is becoming more aware of mental illness, opportunities for treatment, and talking a good game about making it more acceptable to talk about. Yet, my observation is that for real people, individually, it is still not especially safe to say those things you mentioned.
Years ago, my dad suddenly asked the family "does anyone else ever get a sudden, unexplained sense of doom?" I was young, didn't understand mental health and thought my dad was being melodramatic. Years later, I came to suspect that it was his way of trying to articulate that he was feeling depressed (seriously depressed, not merely "sad").
I didn't know how to help him then, or now. But, I think through open dialog such as your column...and many other public figures...we'll slowly chip away until perhaps a comment about a trip to the therapist is taken with the same attitude as a comment about a trip to the orthopedist.
I get that you are not equating your shitty day with someone suffering depression. But, even talking openly about your shitty day is a step toward our society being more healthy around the whole idea of mental health.
I hope. That's the goal. I just think we STILL have a social stigma about talking about mental health. Which scares me because it's clear that our collective mental health is declining.
I love how you write! It’s as if you’re having a conversation with me. I always looked forward to your comments on CNN and very thankful that I have the opportunity to continue the connection.
Thanks, Ed!
Too true. Like you I've never dealt with serious depression, but if I'm having the proverbial bad day each thing that goes wrong makes it exponentially worse. There are no easy answers but there is help. I had to be talked into seeing a therapist -- including by friends and family members who had gone that route themselves -- and that was a good thing. If you can't snap out of a bad day don't think you're all alone. Reach out to a support person (family member, friend, clergy, therapist, etc.) and don't be afraid to ask for help. It's a sign you're going to be all right.
Totally. This period post-CNN has been really challenging for me. But sharing it has helped immensely.
Hi! I’m feeling so anxious today, and I feel silly being anxious, sitting in my comfortable house with my healthy kids. But here I am. The brain is a wild organ!
Thanks for sharing!
Chris,
SO BRAVE to offer your personal challenge.
I can "relate" (as we said from back in the day) dealing with depression and ADD back in the day when the "treatment " was a crack in the head and "get up and do something."
Certainly RXs are there...never helped me much.
Suggest you stay away from the negativity --- difficult in your line of work.
Take joy from the simple aspects of life --- a good friend, a good song, a good, poem, a good book, a good walk.
And in the antiquated term -- "Just keep on keeping on!"
Best wishes always!!
C.
So glad that writing is therapeutic for you! Your willingness to write about personal struggles and successes helps those of us who have similar experiences with life. Please continue to write about your journey, as well as the political landscape! Your insights are greatly appreciated!
Thanks, Alan! I will!