58 Comments

What a wonderful column, and a great topic to discuss further with your class - I am sure no one has talked to them about what happens if there is a break in your career, which most will experience...just a thought

Thanks for sharing. It is good to reaffirm that most people are inherently good, and want to help, if you simply ask.

Congratulations, and best wishes on the continuation of your journey.

And, happy to help, if I can...

Expand full comment
author

Thanks so much, Mike.

Expand full comment

Thank you, Chris, for these suggestions; I had my career of 35 years end about a month ago with my position eliminated and my employment terminated. I've reached out to several old colleagues from previous years and the conversations have been encouraging. Not so much in that they have ,strictly speaking , led to new opportunities, but more in line with general psychological support and camaraderie. I'm not really in a position to retire, with two kids in college and a wife working in a tech start-up that doesn't pay, so looking for any offers at the moment. It's startling, but talking with people certainly does ease the strain a bit, I'll admit.

Expand full comment
author

Absolutely. There are a lot of good people who are genuinely willing to help -- is what I have found.

Expand full comment

What a wonderful post. Great advice. Getting fired sucks. Embarrassing, depressing, demoralizing (speaking from experience here)

I love this authentic and generous post.

Happy to be a paid subscriber.

Expand full comment
author

Thanks so much for being one, DeeDee!

Expand full comment

As someone who was laid off in January and it still very much stings (Even though I found employment), I appreciate this column and the advice.

It's definitely very jarring to have your whole life tied up in your job and your co-workers (and the drama, so much drama!) only to have that just taken away from you on a random Wednesday.

Expand full comment
author

1000%

Expand full comment

When it happened to me I had a similar reaction and took a similar path forward. I didn't know then it would be one of the best things to happen to me.

I often reflect on Robert Frost's poem The Road Not Taken,

"I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference."

It did indeed make all the difference for me.

Expand full comment
author

Inspiring. Thanks, Tom.

Expand full comment

I hope the road treats you well. And that your sigh, ages hence, will be as thankful as mine.

Expand full comment

You have learned a whole lot, grasshopper.

"I realized I had been wrong about a lot of stuff during this process." That's the most important thing you could learn. Often you will find, in such a situation, that you have been living life "upside-down" and thinking it was "right-side up." I know I did. That was very important to learn.

When you get to the point of having a list of things you might do, choose the one you REALLY LIKE, no matter how "out there" or "weird" it might seem. Because that's the one you'll work hard enough to achieve that you'll achieve it. And when you're doing what you really like, everything else falls into line. Relationships with everybody, creative energy, happiness. And the money shows up. Back in the 80s someone wrote "Do What You Love And The Money Will Follow." That sounds pretty hippy-dippy, but it's actually true. When you're doing what you really like, you do it better than anything else you might do.

I'm speaking from personal experience. As I once said several years ago to an old friend from the Before Times, "the worst day I've had since I left was better than the best day I had when I was there."

Good luck. Don't worry about the time it takes. "To every thing, there is a season." Just keep on keeping on.

Expand full comment
author

Thanks what I am aiming to do!

Expand full comment

Chris, every time you write about personal things, it makes you seem so "real". Not just a distant media personality whom I've been following, but a real, down to earth person, who I respect and appreciate. If you ever find that you'll be coming to Omaha, NE, it would be fun to sit with you in person and share a lunch. I can't tell you "who you should talk to", but I would enjoy buying you lunch.

Expand full comment
author

Thanks, Andy. I may take you up on that!

Expand full comment

Good for you! It really helps in jolting times of transition to stop and ask yourself, “what might be good about this? Or What can I learn?” And don’t forget, your kids, who will definitely not have one employer for their entire working life, are watching how you respond to this. Some cool opportunities for hopefully authentic family conversations!

Expand full comment
author

Absolutely, Leslie. I have thought a bunch of times about how I am modeling struggle and challenge for my kids.

Expand full comment

Another bonus is that you appreciate how important family is relative to a job.

Expand full comment

Fortunately didn't have to experience being fired or laid off. Made my escape prior to a layoff after a merger and later left on my own before a company was sold. Got lucky on that one. My last job was the best, but nothing beats retirement. 😁

Expand full comment

I'm so glad you are able to see and enjoy the positive aspects of what must have seemed like a major misfortune at the time. I'm struck by your comment that you felt a good part of your identity was tied up in your job. I retired some years ago and had to confront that changed self view myself. In my case it was much easier than I anticipated - turns out that my job really was not part of me at all, but social custom often works against that sense of separation. Ultimately, you want to be satisfied with your identity of the moment rather than any past or future expectation. Not always easy but great when you get there.

Expand full comment
author

Amen.

Expand full comment

I am late career, been a product manager for 25 years now (58 years old) and if I got laid off, I would soft retire. I would move away from California (my mortgage and tax load here are brutal) to one of the places my wife and I are considering retiring to, and then get a job at like Lowes or some similar place to work enough to get healthcare.

I could swing retirement if (and only if) I had healthcare. My wife is Medicare age, so that is good, but I have 7 years to go, and the $25K or so a year of premiums/out of pocket spend for a silver ACA plan would make retirement impossible.

I am lucky that I will extract enough equity from my house here in California that we will be able to buy outright a decent home in most of the country.

Great post Chris!

Expand full comment
author

Good luck! And thanks!

Expand full comment

Pure gold. I got to discover what the light looks like at 9:00 am on the Golden Gate Bridge, more time to smile at people and have them smile back (truly wonderful,) hanging out with other parents before school lets out and no lift lines mid week in Tahoe!

Expand full comment
author

Lovely!

Expand full comment
founding

As a survivor of being laid off 4 times (thank you, biotech), I found your article to be very helpful.

Loneliness is a big issue for the unemployed. I did volunteer work or consulting during each of my breaks. Plus I always ended up in an even better situation when I did find new employment.

Two things my retired dad told me when I was laid off the first time - don’t watch daytime tv and don’t drink before 5pm.

All the best during your break!

Expand full comment

Such a positive encouraging message Thanks, Chris!

Expand full comment

Great column. I look forward to your next venture. I really enjoy the Substack. The issue is much like streaming, as more content goes this route the costs start to add up. Is there a way to package a bundle of Substack authors?

Expand full comment