You are a wonderful and thoughtful writer. Your pieces reflect the variety of thoughts that we all have day to day. I used to always search the CNN website by your name first to read or view anything you had to say. I have learned so much about Politics (redistricting after the 2020 census!) and enjoy the “Chris Cillizza Flavor” in your work. Thank you for what you do…and Happy Father’s Day!
Self-employment opens more doors than you can imagine. I miss you on CNN ( The Point), but you are happier and I still have your insightful articles. Thanks for your observations!
Chris, I've read *all* of your columns clear back to your WaPo days. I was really bummed when you were no longer at CNN. Fortunately, I randomly found your column on Substack (I follow several other writers there, and your name popped up). Thrilled! So, while you are being the best Dad you can possibly be, and your family is lucky to have you being present for them, I also am terribly glad you are writing again. Balancing the two passions will be an ongoing learning experience for you. Best wishes, and Happy belated Father's Day.
I do LOVE writing -- and it's a way for me to process stuff. But I also want to continue to make sure I am living life rather than just thinking about living life.
Chris, this is why I respect your writing and your opinions as much as I do. You seem like a real person. I applaud you waiting a day to write this post, and spend the day with your family. While you don't claim to be a perfect example of fatherhood, I see you as a perfect example of a real person striving to be a good dad. I love that you see the value in your presence (it's similar to how my wife and I can be silent in the same room and still revel in just being together, each reading our own what-not, etc.). I greatly appreciate you sharing your realness. I think it gives all of us something to identify with, and I love your expression of what your goals are for your role with your family. Happy belated Father's Day, Chris.
Being present is SO underrated and undervalued in our society. I have the luxury of time these days and am trying (emphasis on trying) to use it to be more present.
This is excellent, Chris!! I can really relate as a dad of two. The kids do not care about work stuff/careers and the gifts don't hold lasting value in the long run. The time together is what counts the most.
It's almost reassuring when these things don't register more for them -- it's basically validation that they can (seemingly) never feel let down by a parent's career hurdle.
Wow, Chris, this is really beautiful. Thanks very much for sharing this. As a father of two children, just a little older than yours, this really resonated with me and was very helpful. Thanks again!
You bet, Andy. I think there are a lot of common experiences in parenting. I am trying to share my own as a way of letting people know they are not alone out there.
I love how reflective you are and so willing to open yourself up to all us readers. I had such respect for you after watching you on MSNBC & CNN and reading your articles over the years. That respect has grown so much since reading your Substack articles whether they are about politics or your personal life. Many, many thanks!
Your comments near the end is the key - previously, it seems you defined yourself as your job (something most men have done forever, and now with the increase of women in the workforce, more and more women are doing this as well...). When someone would ask you to tell them about Chris Cillizza, I would bet most of the time, the first thing you said is, "I am a reporter..." or "I am a journalist...", or "I am with CNN...", etc. - usually starting the description with what you do. What you do is NOT who you are. Your job should not define you - it is something you do part of the time, and as you are hopefully learning, without a job does not and should not make you a different person - not having a job is nothing more than inconvenient. You have probably seen this, maybe with older colleagues or relatives - when people who define themselves as their job actually retire - they struggle - they define themselves as their job, so when the job is over, they feel lost, and truly do not know who they are. And those who define themselves as a father, spouse, family member, nature lover, hiker, etc. etc., as you have discovered, those continue even if there is no job.
I was temporarily out of work once in my career, and learned all of what you are, and have never looked back. I ended up coaching soccer for 8 years - something I would never have done without my reeducation. Like you, I attended dance recitals, choir performances, sporting events galore, and not only attended, however, was present with my children. Now, when I think back, those are the memories I enjoy - all of the work accomplishments are secondary.
Wish you all the best as you continue your journey - only hope it is as great and fulfilling for you as mine has been.
Beautifully written, Chris. My husband was a workaholic for many years through our sons life, however, he tried like heck to always be there for the important things. It put a lot of stress on him but he did the best that he could. We are now retired, our son is married and looking back through the years, my husband sees that there were times he would have been more of a dad and less of a worker. Obviously doing what needed to be done at work but instead of 70-80 hours per week, do 60 hours instead. Kids are so easy to please as long as you are present with them. A quick story that was touching to hear. Friends of ours had 2 young kids and the father was also a workaholic, one Sunday they decided to take the kids here, there and everywhere. They spent a lot of money for the day but at bedtime, the kids said that the best part of the day was getting ice cream and being silly. It’s the little things at times that mean the most to the kids.
When I was still in the work world, I would automatically respond at gatherings and dutiful answer the "what do you do" question with the my professional role answer.
I became a father late (turned 40 three weeks after my Alexandra was born).
Thereafter, I occasionally answered the question from above, "I'm a father."
You can imagine the variety of responses I received from it, and the different direction that took the conversation!!😉
Thank you for sharing, Chris. One of the things I love about your writing is your openness about your own struggles and successes (and your snarky comments 😄). It seems like you are understanding that, even though this is a hard time for you, it is also an enormous gift. The teenage years are hard and the biggest thing you can do is be there. You're also teaching them that a person's job is not what gives them value as a good person. I'm glad you had a great Father's Day!
Thanks, Laura. I am trying! I view it as an opportunity -- to use my platform to share what I hope are common experiences people are going through. Knowing there are others out there struggling with the same stuff I am provides huge comfort to me.
One of the best pieces you’ve written in years. No politics, no culture wars, no apocalyptic threats, just you writing about your feelings, your family and yourself. Sneak in a few more of these please.
Congratulations on being a Dad. I believe it is the most important role a man plays in his life. Regardless of titles, employers, or materialism. Although unquestionably when we are able to spoil our kids it is a blessing. But providing a good role model, being there when you can, because you want to. And being a good role model. Thank you for sharing your story. Believe me, they will be grown and gone before you know it.
You are a wonderful and thoughtful writer. Your pieces reflect the variety of thoughts that we all have day to day. I used to always search the CNN website by your name first to read or view anything you had to say. I have learned so much about Politics (redistricting after the 2020 census!) and enjoy the “Chris Cillizza Flavor” in your work. Thank you for what you do…and Happy Father’s Day!
Thanks, Julia. That means a lot.
Self-employment opens more doors than you can imagine. I miss you on CNN ( The Point), but you are happier and I still have your insightful articles. Thanks for your observations!
Thanks,. Richard. It's been an adjustment for sure. But, as with anything, there are both good and bad things to it.
While tough struggling as an independent, it gives you more (precarious?) freedom.
Good luck and keep on keeping on, as we said in my days of imbibing trendy chemical amusements.
One of the best things I’ve ever read from you, Chris. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks. Rowen!
Chris, I've read *all* of your columns clear back to your WaPo days. I was really bummed when you were no longer at CNN. Fortunately, I randomly found your column on Substack (I follow several other writers there, and your name popped up). Thrilled! So, while you are being the best Dad you can possibly be, and your family is lucky to have you being present for them, I also am terribly glad you are writing again. Balancing the two passions will be an ongoing learning experience for you. Best wishes, and Happy belated Father's Day.
Thanks so much, Lisa.
I do LOVE writing -- and it's a way for me to process stuff. But I also want to continue to make sure I am living life rather than just thinking about living life.
Chris, this is why I respect your writing and your opinions as much as I do. You seem like a real person. I applaud you waiting a day to write this post, and spend the day with your family. While you don't claim to be a perfect example of fatherhood, I see you as a perfect example of a real person striving to be a good dad. I love that you see the value in your presence (it's similar to how my wife and I can be silent in the same room and still revel in just being together, each reading our own what-not, etc.). I greatly appreciate you sharing your realness. I think it gives all of us something to identify with, and I love your expression of what your goals are for your role with your family. Happy belated Father's Day, Chris.
Thanks, Andy.
Being present is SO underrated and undervalued in our society. I have the luxury of time these days and am trying (emphasis on trying) to use it to be more present.
This is excellent, Chris!! I can really relate as a dad of two. The kids do not care about work stuff/careers and the gifts don't hold lasting value in the long run. The time together is what counts the most.
They don't care in the least! I thought my kids would be devastated when I told them I got laid off. They barely remembered it the next day.
It's almost reassuring when these things don't register more for them -- it's basically validation that they can (seemingly) never feel let down by a parent's career hurdle.
Wow, Chris, this is really beautiful. Thanks very much for sharing this. As a father of two children, just a little older than yours, this really resonated with me and was very helpful. Thanks again!
You bet, Andy. I think there are a lot of common experiences in parenting. I am trying to share my own as a way of letting people know they are not alone out there.
I love how reflective you are and so willing to open yourself up to all us readers. I had such respect for you after watching you on MSNBC & CNN and reading your articles over the years. That respect has grown so much since reading your Substack articles whether they are about politics or your personal life. Many, many thanks!
I am trying to be more open, Dee. I feel like I have this platform so I might as well use it to honestly detail my life -- warts and all.
Bravo, Chris! Congratulations.
Your comments near the end is the key - previously, it seems you defined yourself as your job (something most men have done forever, and now with the increase of women in the workforce, more and more women are doing this as well...). When someone would ask you to tell them about Chris Cillizza, I would bet most of the time, the first thing you said is, "I am a reporter..." or "I am a journalist...", or "I am with CNN...", etc. - usually starting the description with what you do. What you do is NOT who you are. Your job should not define you - it is something you do part of the time, and as you are hopefully learning, without a job does not and should not make you a different person - not having a job is nothing more than inconvenient. You have probably seen this, maybe with older colleagues or relatives - when people who define themselves as their job actually retire - they struggle - they define themselves as their job, so when the job is over, they feel lost, and truly do not know who they are. And those who define themselves as a father, spouse, family member, nature lover, hiker, etc. etc., as you have discovered, those continue even if there is no job.
I was temporarily out of work once in my career, and learned all of what you are, and have never looked back. I ended up coaching soccer for 8 years - something I would never have done without my reeducation. Like you, I attended dance recitals, choir performances, sporting events galore, and not only attended, however, was present with my children. Now, when I think back, those are the memories I enjoy - all of the work accomplishments are secondary.
Wish you all the best as you continue your journey - only hope it is as great and fulfilling for you as mine has been.
Agree! Your job is not who you are. Man that has been a HARD lesson for me to learn. And once I learned the hard way!
It may be hard, however, the result will pay great dividends for the rest of your life.
Reminds me of stories my mother never told me - sometimes the dragon wins...Life is hard, which make the things we learn from life that much sweeter.
Please keep up the great writing - feel privileged you are willing to share it with us
Beautifully written, Chris. My husband was a workaholic for many years through our sons life, however, he tried like heck to always be there for the important things. It put a lot of stress on him but he did the best that he could. We are now retired, our son is married and looking back through the years, my husband sees that there were times he would have been more of a dad and less of a worker. Obviously doing what needed to be done at work but instead of 70-80 hours per week, do 60 hours instead. Kids are so easy to please as long as you are present with them. A quick story that was touching to hear. Friends of ours had 2 young kids and the father was also a workaholic, one Sunday they decided to take the kids here, there and everywhere. They spent a lot of money for the day but at bedtime, the kids said that the best part of the day was getting ice cream and being silly. It’s the little things at times that mean the most to the kids.
It's SO true, Elaine. It's the quiet moments. It's not taking them to the amusement park. It's the car ride there and back!
Nice reveal, Cristo.
When I was still in the work world, I would automatically respond at gatherings and dutiful answer the "what do you do" question with the my professional role answer.
I became a father late (turned 40 three weeks after my Alexandra was born).
Thereafter, I occasionally answered the question from above, "I'm a father."
You can imagine the variety of responses I received from it, and the different direction that took the conversation!!😉
Thank you for sharing, Chris. One of the things I love about your writing is your openness about your own struggles and successes (and your snarky comments 😄). It seems like you are understanding that, even though this is a hard time for you, it is also an enormous gift. The teenage years are hard and the biggest thing you can do is be there. You're also teaching them that a person's job is not what gives them value as a good person. I'm glad you had a great Father's Day!
Thanks, Laura. I am trying! I view it as an opportunity -- to use my platform to share what I hope are common experiences people are going through. Knowing there are others out there struggling with the same stuff I am provides huge comfort to me.
You nailed it! Family is, and always will be, everything that really counts.
Sometimes the worst possible event in your mind becomes the best catalyst for a wonderful new life.
One of the best pieces you’ve written in years. No politics, no culture wars, no apocalyptic threats, just you writing about your feelings, your family and yourself. Sneak in a few more of these please.
Congratulations on being a Dad. I believe it is the most important role a man plays in his life. Regardless of titles, employers, or materialism. Although unquestionably when we are able to spoil our kids it is a blessing. But providing a good role model, being there when you can, because you want to. And being a good role model. Thank you for sharing your story. Believe me, they will be grown and gone before you know it.